"I know this is a controversial and divisive subject, and that wars have been fought over less," he answers gravely, "but it's not a real pecan pie if it's not a pie with pecans in it. Don't fool me with a nut topping, give me that syrupy jello inside, and pretend that's a pecan pie..."

(ooc: just for the record, you're making me VERY hungry, lol)